My husband and I were each other’s second spouses. When we met, we fell hard, fast, and all the way. We dove in with reckless abandon, with full confidence that we knew exactly what we wanted and that we were it.
One of the things we wanted was to have kids and for me to stay home with them. We had never had kids and neither of us had ever “stayed home” unless you count flaking on yet another show at yet another venue back when Austin was home and people still sweat together in crowds.
It took us quite…
I have always been into travel. My first long-haul flight was so long ago that it occurred on a double-decker airplane whose spiral staircase led to a fully functioning bar where smoking was legal and allowable.
A semester abroad in college opened wide my astonished eyes to the immense variety of life, landscape, culture, and flavor on our humble planet. When I met my spouse, we eagerly exchanged stories of the places we’d been and the long list of destinations we planned to get to sooner or later.
When we had kids, we knew we wanted to open their minds…
I gave them one last look of love before I picked up my bag and walked out the door. These three humans may have my heart, but tonight I needed to go.
Yay! I was rooting for you to choose to go despite the tears! It is incredibly important for you to have time to yourself doing activities that are just for you. The good news is that it is also REALLY good for your kids. Everyone wins when we practice self care.
I told myself it was for the best. I insisted that I was definitely better off. But the truth is, getting fired for establishing a fair boundary stung more than expected. And I’m just getting over it.
They were my first big client. I was thrilled when they offered me the ongoing contract work. The opportunity to get my words in front of a huge following was, in a word, exhilarating.
And the words flowed. The niche was an excellent fit for me. I found the content super easy to write, the topics enjoyable to research and think about, and…
To say the collective mental wellbeing of the entire world is suffering would be a gross misrepresentation of the current state. I mean, yes. There’s a light at the end of the tunnel and we are finally really starting to believe that it’s not an oncoming train. But…
The insane pandemic, racial-reckoning, wild-west political landscape, absolute mind- and life-shift rollercoaster ride we’ve been on the last year has been dizzying to say the least. And it’s going to take some time to feel centered and firmly planted again.
If you are feeling stressed, overwhelmed, tired, and guilt-ridden in your role…
Thanks to the wildy unusual last year or so of our collective lives, we have all felt the disconnect that happens when we cannot physically connect to our loved ones on a regular basis. Totally sucks, right? For some of us, physical separation is normal operating procedure, pre and post-pandemic. And yes, it presents a ton of challenges.
For going on three years, my husband and I have spent the mass majority of the work week apart, coming together as a couple and a family on weekends only. I have learned that there is some truth to “distance makes the…
…ith someone to share your feelings with someone, then you shouldn’t be sharing your body with them. If you’re not comfortable enough with someone to put a condom on them yourself or in front of them with them watching, then you shouldn’t be having sex with them.
The Good Men Project
I love this entire article but this sentence right here? I'm memorizing it to tell my two boys when the time comes. I love how specifically it illustrates the point in a concrete way that any person of sexually-curious age could understand.
My boys know about sex as a means for procreation but they are still quite young so we haven't gotten into the pleasure side of things yet. They also know that the human sexuality spectrum is vast and not simply hetero. But well beyond that, I want them to embrace their sexuality in a safe, consentual, exploratory fashion that is completely shame free. Shame has been a huge struggle in my own sexuality and I do not want them to "inheret" that from me.
If you are anything like me, the minute a school fundraiser folder comes home from school you back away slowly, keeping your eye on the potential attacker and then run, fast, in the other direction. Clearly, I’m not a big fan.
The schools need money. I know this. But I epically failed at an attemped sales career for a damn good reason. I hate selling things. So when my very enthused kids came home all stoked for their Apex Leadership virtual fundraiser my groan was audible before I had the good sense to rein it in.
We were (predictably) total…
…ed it to be — with my child. I didn’t lose the work opportunity because of my skills or experience. I was making the conscious decision not to pursue it because I had other priorities. It was my choice, and I owned it.
I have struggled with this greatly as I chose to give up my career to stay home. Now that my kids are older and my peers are wildly successful in their careers, I wonder if I chose wisely. I will never regret staying home but learning to live with not having it ALL is indeed a tough pill to swallow.
Now given this fact, if parents try to teach self-control by relying on rewards or by taking things away, then we ultimately inhibit the ability of our children and teens to develop the critical piece of control they need the most — namely, the ability to control themselves. This is why it is called “self-control” and not “parent-driven control.”
Mind. Blown. I have never considered the system of rewards and punishments this way. Thank you for a very informative piece.
Mom. Wife. Writer. Reader. Walker. Traveler. Yogi. Dog lover. Booty shaker. Belly laugher. Hugger. Friend forever.